What Am I Doin' Hangin' 'Round?

I'm so frustrated. First of all, I'm broke. After my rent check goes through and I pay as much of my counseling as I can with my debit card (I can pay some of it with cash) on Thursday, I will have five dollars in the bank. Of course, I get paid the next day, but it's still not much. I probably won't have money again until I get my tax return in March. And don't say "you're not the only one." Everyone keeps telling me that. It doesn't make me feel better. I'm the only one I know who's really struggling. I want advice on what to do next, not to be told I'm not the only one who has no money.

Work was horrible. Though it wasn't as busy as yesterday, people were cranky, rude, obnoxious, and just plain mean. Just an hour after I arrived, one woman got angry at me when I tried to explain that I took the extra sales on her Canada Dry 12 packs of soda manually, since she didn't have the Acme sales card that takes them off automatically. Because I took the sales off manually, they were reflected in the final price she paid, but not in the prices of the item on the receipt. She absolutely refused to hear it! She told me I had a bad attitude and was being nasty and left! I just cried and cried after that, even when the bagger and the customer behind her told me I was fine. If I was fine, why did she say I was rude?

It was like that all day, and not just for me, either. Several cashiers and clerks later reported that they'd had to handle many grouchy and rude customers today as well. It's that beginning-of-the-month thing again. Many of these people are coming from Camden with chips on their shoulders a mile wide and no money other than what they have in food stamps...half of which goes to junk like huge birthday cakes. I had food stamps when I first got out of college, and the only cakes I bought with them were cake mixes and Little Debbie snack cakes.

I received a far more pleasant surprise when I came home. Mom told me yesterday she'd sent out a late Christmas present in the mail late last week. It finally arrived this evening. She gave me a snowman "angel" made of real wool felt covered with glitter, with wire wings and a wire halo and a bean bag bottom. He's so cool...and not so Christmassy he'll have to be put away in a few days. He'll stay out all winter long with the general winter items. She also sent me a real Wilton gingerbread man cookie cutter with a plastic grip handle. (I usually only make roll-out cookies at Christmas, but after the molasses cookies came out so well, maybe I'll have to change that...)

There was a card in the mail along with Mom's package. It was a very late Christmas card from my good friend in Wildwood, Kelly. A really late card - the long letter in it was dated December 16th. Either it took her that long to mail it...or the mail's really unreliable these days. I hadn't heard a lot from Kelly other than an occasional online chat since I left Wildwood in January 2006, and it was great to hear from her.