Friday, May 07, 2010

My Day

I spent the day with a fellow. He was a big, handsome, strapping black fellow. Big, strong chest, and very sweet eyes. We listened to jazz, watched the new Clash of the Titans on his computer, and worked on my laptop. He told me a great story about meeting blues legend BB King at a rodeo, and how he inspired him to wrestle a bull and win prize money. (I was honestly envious of him for that one.)

He said he felt passion for me, but ultimately, I just wasn't feeling the same. He was very nice to me, and he said a great deal that made me think. He was very intelligent and kind, but I just couldn't feel the passion he did. He was here a long time, and we did a lot of things around the house. He even helped me clear some unnecessary programs off my laptop, which I am grateful to him for.

By the time he'd left, though, when I had time to think, I finally decided that, as much as he'd helped me and as nice as he was, I just wasn't feeling what he was feeling. I called him when he got home (he walked, bless him!) and told him. He seemed disappointed, but not upset.

I don't regret the day at all. It gave me a lot to think about. I don't often get to spend a day with a mature adult. Most of all, what it made me realize is...I need to really, really ease into a relationship. I just can't jump into things. Maybe I'm an adult, but I'm not quite ready for more than casual dating yet. Five years is a long time between relationships. I'm a very independent and very old-fashioned girl, and a guy who dates me is going to have to live with that.

Sometimes, love comes right away, and sometimes, it may take a while.
Mina Aino (Sailor Venus), dubbed version of Sailor Moon Super S episode "Double Trouble"

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